5 Things That Can Easily Fuck Up A Skaters Day
Here are a few gentle reminders of how easy it is for your day to go from dope AF to nope AF! Take a look and see if some of these relate to any of your previous skate missions as we go over some of the potential fuckeries!
1. THE WEATHER
It doesn’t matter ‘weather’ it’s the rain, the snow, the temperature, or even the wind that you’re trying to battle. They all have one thing in common, and that is that they’re all capable of completely fucking up your day, no matter how much you try to ignore the signs or beat the bad weather by racing to the breaks in the clouds, with some hope that you beat the storm and manage to squeeze in 5 minutes of shred time before it's rained out.
Sometimes it feels like someone's getting a kick out of this, waiting for your wheels to hit concrete just so they can hit a ‘Shit Weather’ button and watch you suffer.
It always seems to happen as soon as you’ve finished with work or your tasks for the day. You’ve probably been looking gormlessly out the window waiting for that time to roll around. You finally clock out and think it’s time to skate in the sunshine, but that overcast has other plans for your evening.
2. PEBBLES/STONES - STOP ROCKS
These little pebbly bitches are enough to ruin anyone's trick or even a whole day, especially if it’s the start of the day and you’re only just heading out for the session… Or even worse, just skating to get to where you have to be, maybe work or school and you end up feeling the full force of damage that these little shits are capable of. No slam feels good at the beginning of the day, but having one before even reaching your first checkpoint, FUCK that!
You can get lucky a lot of the time and maybe you slam in front of a group of chicks and walk away with nothing more than a bit of embarrassment, or maybe you’re hauling ass down some steep hill and your wheels decide to literally stop dead and shake hands with a rock. Which of course then causes you to go in full-on Scorpion mode for the next 5 meters. High-speed stop rocks are definitely the worst, having to peel your clothes off of your skin because the cotton from your clothing and your torn, bloody tissue have congealed and formed its own velcro.
Dealing with security is bad enough, but when it is police giving you hassle it can be far worse. The pigs have the power to go further and issue you a ticket with an unreasonably expensive fine even just for being a skater in the wrong place at the wrong time. All it takes is one bad morning with the wifey to kickstart the power trip of a true tooled-up pig. Most of the ones who are going to give you beef are the same ones that had a hard time in school with the other kids and now as adults, they feel like they need to prove a point as they wear the uniform of ultimate power.
It doesn’t matter whether you are sitting down smoking a cigarette or you’re trying to tre flip el toro… If a police officer decides they are going to step in and fuck up your entire day, unless you're running away, you really are fucked. Look forward to picking your board up from the Po-Po station along with a harsh fine and a dumb proud look on the officer's face for knowing he’s wasted your good weather and time.
4. Snapping or Breaking your Board
There’s nothing worse than finally getting to the spot you’ve been driving to all day, only to be let down by the sound of your ply’s crunching and tearing away from each other as you land heavy-footed and snap that bitch into two. There is only one feeling you will get at this point, and it’s the depressing sinking heavy feeling that covers you like a blanket as you realise your fate… Your whole day will now only consist of using other people's board for a ‘quick go’ and then being asked to constantly film this or film that. The same feeling follows but only now it’s gotten more intense as you realise the worst part is the fact that your journey has now been extended by another 20 minutes as you now have to walk down all of those smooth sidewalks and hill-bombs that are on the way home.
5. SPOT BUSTS
A real kick in the balls is when you arrive at a spot, one that you are particularly hyped about skating, then when you get there, you find it to be a total bust.
Most times it can turn out that there is just too much security around the area or police, or maybe it just happens to be where the town is hosting some random and more often than not, a completely un-orthodox event that now of course ends up occupying the entirety of the spot, that is what I call a certified bust!